how do you like me now?

last night, yanno, when i couldn't sleep, i clicked the TV over to AMC. whatcha know. Never Been Kissed was playing. My most favorite line from the whole movie is probably:

Merkin: I'm just a little tense. This whole office is not Feng Shui. All the desks are facing evil.

this movie, while cheezy at best, always makes me ponder. could be my lil crush on Michael Vartan but either way, contemplating anything is not necessarily a bad thing, unless it's @ 3am when you're already trying to nod-off for a few winks that you're already weeks deprived of....

it's weird how the thought process works too. i mean really. the movie (for those who haven't seen it) is about a 25 yo female reporter who, in her first undercover assignment, has to go back to high school. 'nuff said. that alone would scare the bejeejeez outta most anyone...

so my thought process went to:
THEN.
wow. back to high school.
i did not fit in very well in most settings back then.
granted i wasn't a "josie grossie" but...
when i did fit in, i still didn't feel like i did.
i was too much of a non-conformist to not be considered a loaner, i had too many bad habits to not be a burn-out. i dressed too stylishly to not be a prep, and i was too conscience of my grades to not be a nerd.

my thoughts then swung full circle...
NOW.
i fit in quite well in some settings, i almost fit in others...
but wow. deja vu. cuz i'm still pretty much a non-conformist. i still don't like for people to tell me what to do. i traded some bad habits for others over the years. i don't know that if i'm better off or not. i still dress stylishly when i want to...and now i'm conscience of my children's school grades.

those who knew me in high school, can attest to the fact. in actuality i'm pretty much the exact "core" person i was back in the day. i think i was "just me" before my time. very few people "got" me back then. some of my friends' parents LOVED me...and others, not so much. my sense of humor, while it's gotten a bit darker in my maturation, was a bit dusk-ish even then.

and what amuses me to no end these days, is that in high school, certain people wouldn't speak to me, but those same people were some of the first to friend me as soon as i created my acct on facebook. ironic much?

just strikes me as odd, how some just couldn't "get" me then, but wow. how do you like me now?